Every once in a while some thing happens......some strange event, or maybe some one comes along and there is this spark of revelations...
And i feel tempted to write....
But it does not happen to often anyways.
So what happened this time, what invoked this knee jerk reaction to make me want to write today? well to tell you the truth, i don't know :)
But then it ws like, i was enjoying my weekend and all. Basically doing nothing at all, and from nowhere, came this whole avalanche of questions? A whole lot of questions.....which i have been asking myself many a times. And o tell you the truth i have never really figured out a "perfect" answer. Like this one, "What is Happiness"?
Now i tell you this is one solide gold question ok! everytime i ask this question my answers change. And that drives me nutts. and i have this stupid habit now of actually "Writing" down the answers. and my oh my .......all of them are damn diffrent.
Back in college, happiness was getting through exams alive....then it became finding a job i loved. This happiness then suddenly morphed itself, into "finding ANY job"
and then momentarily it was doing the best in my job.
and soem where during the transitions and turn of pages pooor happiness, got , well, kinda ......LOST!
i do not really know where is my happiness right now. Is it in doing the right thing for my carrer, or is it doing the best in my job right now? o is it in making my folks happy? or is it in doing the right thing and basically being a fucckin boy scout!
Well i am sorry i know my language is taking a toss
Anyways the thing is that now she has got lost., and its been quiet some time since i could really find it. But then i thought of this stupid blog n all and i suddenly started missing some of my really good frnds here. Like marie Frey.....i used to like that one...and at some point of ime, gettin comments from her used to make me happy. Take Pallavi Sharma, my little wookie, my gaurdian angel. I tell you if you find one frnd who even comes 1 % close to what this girl is, well you will not need to keep lookin for happiness no more. Like i am.
But then, i do not know even why i am thinking about you all. Why i miss you all? Buy i know for sure that i have lost something, my happiness, my focus and my resolve. I let things happen to me to a point where i lost control.....and i am not being able to grab hold of that ever elusinve cliche' of a "Perfect Happy Life"
it will take me some time to figure that one out but one day i am going to crack this code....i am going to find out the root of all this. Which makes people go round n round.....
Well till then.....have a nice life
5 comments:
well just writing this comment to tell u that i have read ur blog... and to tell u that i just liked ur style of writing and nothing else in it for the content of this blog is not at all in my favour.... so ... i m sorry for saying this but ya u r real good with words.... that is all that i can appreciate!!!!
hmmmmm.... it is a natural process that we all do miss the real good times spent in our past feel sad and term ourself as unhappy but then at the end of the day one has to get up and face a new morning,,, and to be true must try to resolve oneself under the so called unhappiness to happiness by living the present day... its not that we get lost in our world of questions but it is that we never try to come out of them!! don u think that the best way to be happy is to live with a free mind which only does think all the questions worth thinking!! becoz at the end of the day we are what we make ourself of!!!!
Hey there!
I'm still around sweetie. Just been really busy. Lots of changes in my life. Too much to go into though. Sorry I've been missing.
I've had the same question running through my head. Part of the reason for my changes in my life. I think what makes a person happy can change constantly because as humans we change constantly. The only thing that stays the same is change. Just stay true to yourself and your happiness will follow.
oh and for the record, I miss you too :)
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